Joseba Arregi Erostarbe, “BURDIN ELORRI ARANTZETAN”

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Nire mundua labirinto bat da. Ehundaka ate ehundaka sarraila, ehundaka kamera, dozenaka alarma eta mila ertz, mila izkina, mila txoko. Iluntasun ugari, ekiaren zeru gutxi eta naturarik deus ez! Labirintoan sartzen dena galdu egiten da, desorekatu. Hemengo labirintoan ez. Badakizu nora mugitu behar duzun 8:30ean, berriro itzultzeko.

Erietxera joateko zazpi ate irekiko dizkizute banan banan, beste hiru ate han barnean, eta beste hainbeste itzultzean. Gero, 10:30ean, kiroldegira; berriro laberintoan itzulika, arropaz edo zapatilaz aldatua. Ordu bat eskasera, berriro itzuli! Labirintoko ertz, izkin, espazio, txoko, alde guztiak markatuak daude. Kontrolatuak gaude gu ere, gure burua eta memoria izan ezik. Tarte bat irekitzen delarik, zeru zati bat agertzen da, ideia bat, ilusio punttua… Leiho bat agertzean, norbait ikusten dugu; nor ote da? Pentsamendua lanean ari da. Hori ezaguna da! Hori berria da! Hori, hor, takillan dagoena, simpa da. Bestea, sasikumea…

Gure labirintoa puzzle bat da. Mila zati ditu, denak ezberdinak dira, eta ez zara galtzen. Oraingo aldian nagoen bunker honek baditu ehun metroko pasilloak; labirinto, modulu, ingreso, lokutorio, kiroldegi, futbol zelai, zine areto, kulturgune, erietxe, sukalde, mantenu eta segurtasun edo isolamendurako bidean; eta, erdi erdian, dorre erraldoi begiluzea! Pasillo horiek gure ikusmena engainatzeko eginak daude. Dotore mantentzen dituzte, preso sozial bolondresei esker, olibondo, pinu, larrosa, iturri, landare, lore, labanda, ezki, hortentsia, belardi, ezkai, krabelin eta bestez jantzitako lorategi eder bat bailiran…

Baina ez dago denborarik horretaz pentsatu eta jardinaz disfrutatzeko, ziztu bizian igarotzen ditugu pasillo horiek. Labirintoaren zati dira. Gu engainatzeko eginak. Alboetako hormak, kanpoko kaleak eta mendiak bezala margotuta daude. Ilusio faltsua eskaintzen dute horma horiek. Pasillo horietan urdinak daude, aingeru zaindariak, “kaleko trafikoa” gidatzen: “¿De qué módulo viene usted? ¿A qué modulo va usted? ¿Cómo se llama usted? ¿Qué módulo tiene usted? ¡Un parte por coger una rosa!”. Donostiako kaleetan ere, 1960an, jendearen trafikoa zaintzen zuten: “¡A usted le pongo una multa por pasar el semáforo en rojo!”.

Labirintoa da nire mundua. Puzzleak, ertzak, bazterrak, txokoak, dena dago bistan.

Dena dago kontrolpean. Urtez urte bildutako esperientzia dute gainean, labirintoan inor galdu ez dadin, inor aspertu ez dadin. Estiloa aldatu diote. Itxura ere hobea du lehen baino. Arauak, ordea, aldatu egin dituzte, eta gaur egun bizirik irauten badugu, kondena guztia bete arte ez dugu askatasunik izango.

Joseba Arregi Erostarbe


Joseba Arregi Erostarbe, marrazkiz marrazki.
Jokin Urain

Kartzelan nola bizitzen ote den, nola irauten den… ez dakit zenbatek ez ote didan galdetu. “Eta ondo atera haiz, gainera” esan izan dit zenbaitek, harridura zintzoz seguru asko, eta niri bezala galdetu eta esango zieten beste hainbati. Ez dakit modu zientifikoan azaltzen kartzelari zelan egiten zaion aurre, zelan irauten den urteak eta urteak. Dakidana eta ikasi dudana da bakoitzak bere moduak dauzkala egunerokoan aurrera egiteko, ez erotzeko eta ez erortzeko. “Noizbaiten askatzen nautenerako” baino, “gaurko” eta “biharko” plan txikiak egunero egitea eta horretan konstantzia izatea da, esango nuke, kartzelak berak irents ez zaitzan metodoa.

Batzuek ikasketak egiten dituzte, beste batzuek kirola, irakurri… Ikasketak burutzea preso askoren ekimen diziplinatua da kartzelan, eta kaleratzen garenerako prestatzea izan daiteke helburu. Kalean ere etorkizun den gerorako prestatzea izaten baita ikasketak egitea. Baina kasu gehienetan urruti xamar ikusten den egun horretarako prestatzea baino helburu hurbilagoa betetzen dute preso gehienentzat. Eta ikasketak egiteak bezala eskulanak egiteak, margotzeak berak.

Lehen ere egina dago Josebaren hainbat marrazkiren azterketa, “Kartzelako Leihotik” (Ataramiñe) liburuan, marrazkiaren azalpenak ere hor daude kasu askotan, eta beste liburu bat beharko litzateke hor agertzen ez diren margolan guztiak aztertzeko edo bakoitzari komentariotxo bat egiteko. Marrazki hauek kate-begiz kate-begi osatzen duten historia narratiboaz harago, bada Josebaren marrazkigintzan nabarmena iruditzen zaidan aspektu bat: bere ingurua margotzen du: inguru afektiboa, inguru geografikoa, inguru kulturala… Inguru hori margotuz eraikitzen ditu bere zutabeak, bere sostengarriak, hasiera batean agian inkontzientean zerabilen eta bizi beharrak eta bizinahiak erakusten zion iparrorratzari jarraituz.

Margotzea, adierazpide piktorikoa alegia, Josebaren bidea egiteko modua da, espetxea eta berak suposatzen duen guztiari aurre egiteko modua. Bere ariketa piktorikoa ez da garatzen soilik helburu artistiko baten bila, ez doa koadro perfektuaren bila. Badu funtzio gauzagarriago bat, koadroz koadro, marrazkiz marrazki lortzen duen funtzio bat: traba eta muga guztien gainetik bere bidea urratuz, edozein gizakirentzat orokorrean, eta frantziar edo espainiar espetxeetan gatibatua den euskal militante batentzat batik bat, egoera horrek suposatzen duena gainditu eta irabazle – espiritualki bere burua berrosatu eta kartzela ia abstrakzioraino gutxietsi – sentitzea.

Oroimineko geografia oso presente dago Josebaren marrazkigintzan. Behin eta berriz jotzen du bere herriko, etxeko, bere oroimenean oso kuttun eta hurbileko zaizkion motiboetara. Hortxe ageri dira jaiotetxea eta etxekoak, auzoak eta auzotarrak. Horiek margotuz berpiztu egiten du, presentera ekarri eta nolabait erreal bihurtu alegia, urruti eta faltan duena; gogoan duen espaziora joaten da marraztean. Espazio horretan aurkitzen ditu mendi edo ibaiak, zelaiak, herriak, baserriko ataria, zakurra, artaldea… Eta udazken-neguko koloreen artean usoak eta oilagorrak nola ez topatu! Baina paisaiak ez dira etxe ingurukoak soilik; hortxe daude etxetik ihes egin behar izan zuenetik ezagutu, miretsi eta bere ingurutzat hartu dituenak ere. Esan liteke folioa edo lientzoa urratuz doala, arian-arian memorian duen paisaia azaltzen zaion arte.

Jendeak, pertsonek, leku handia dute Josebaren espazio piktorikoan. Etxekoak eta auzokoak, burkide eroriak, lagunak, espetxean kide dituenak, behin eta berriz ageri dira. Zentzu horretan, norbanakoz norbanako, gizarte oso bat margotzen du, bere-berea duen gizartea, hurbil-hurbilekoa sentimentalki. Espetxeetan ikusi duen gizartea ere margotu du, euskal presoetatik haratago drogaren eta endekamenduaren izurritean bizi direnen gizartea.

Baina esango nuke margotzen dituen pertsonen artean leku oso nabarmena eta berebizikoa dutela emakumeek. Hor daude ama, neska-laguna, lagunak… Arestiren aitaren etxearen metaforari, amaren suaren metafora gehitzen zion euskal pentsalari batek, amaren su hori delako etxeari zutik eta bizirik eusten diona. Eta iruditzen zait bete-betean esan litekeela horixe Josebaren etxe afektiboari dagokionean. Ama margotzen duenean, etxeko emakumeak edo lagunak margotzen dituenean, bere margoetan neska-laguna (bera ere ama; seme alabarik izan ez arren emakume guztiak baitira nolabait ama) behin eta berriz presente dagoenean, bere mundu afektibo hori hauspotzen ari da, etxeko suari indar ematen ari da. Bere etxe afektiboaren sua, bihotza eta zutabe nagusia ere bada ama.

Espetxea bera da Josebaren beste motibo piktorikoetako bat, nahiko errekurrentea gainera. Batzuetan kanpotik begiratuko dio espetxeari, bestetan patioa agertuko da, ziega, galeria… Eta xehetasun txikiak ere bai, horma gainetako txarrantxak edo ateetako sarrailak, esku-burdinak, jangelako mahaiak eta bandejak… “Geografia” hori margotzeak badu zerikusia lekukotzarekin, ikusten duen horren testigantza uztearekin; salaketa ere badago kartzelako drogazaleak eta miseriaren atzaparretan eroriak margotzen dituenean. Hala ere, kartzela, bai eraikuntza orokorra eta bai kartzelaren barrunbeak – munstroaren, izuen gordelekuaren erraiak -, margotzen dituenean, kartzela eta kartzelak suposatzen duena desegite saioan ari da etengabe. Margotuz desegiten du kartzela, ingurua ixten dion eraikin zatar hori. Behin eta berriz margotu-desegin beharreko espazioa du espetxea, goizero ekin beharreko zeregina du, ezin utzia; 14munstroa hortxe ageri zaiolako goizero, egunero, gauero; ziega margotuz desegiten du ziega, hormak edo txarrantxak margotuz eraisten ditu itxiturak, barroteak margotuz irekitzen ditu leihoak, sarrailak margotuz zabaltzen ditu ateak.

Izuen gordelekuan konstantzia nekagaitzean arituz munstroa gainditu duenaren keinua eskaintzen digu Josebak margo hauetan.

Hau guztia esanda ere, ez dugu agian asko esan, batzuentzat gehiegi igual esan dugu baina. Begiraleek ikusiko dute eta esan beharko dute zer ageri den euren iritziz.

2015eko urria

Kartzelako leihotik

/ literatura koadernoak / ataramiñe / literaturakoadernoak.org /

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